


Karma

by sunnyskipper



Series: DREAMSMP ONE-SHOTS / SHORT STORIES [1]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, How much emotional trauma can these kids get oh my god, Mentioned Clay | Dream (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Jschlatt (Video Blogging RPF), Mentioned Wilbur Soot, Mild Language, Therapy, These kids need it sheesh, let this be canon one day, rated teens for mild swearing, song; Karma (AJR)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-12 09:40:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29258328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnyskipper/pseuds/sunnyskipper
Summary: With the many hardships following the beginning and end of L'manberg, it's sure taken it's toll on its former citizens. Everyone has suffered, but three kids are the first to admit to it, and receive feedback from the newly run therapy session, offered by none other than the residence Mother and former knight, Captain Puffy at your service.( inspired by ajr's song "karma" and the animatic by the same name done by Red_png on youtube, watch it. )
Relationships: No Romantic Relationship(s)
Series: DREAMSMP ONE-SHOTS / SHORT STORIES [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2159262
Comments: 3
Kudos: 49





	1. I've been so good, I've been helpful and friendly

After long preparation, Puffy set up her office. She's thought about being a therapist for a while now, the people once residing in L'manberg, which has since been blown up, clearly need help. She's here to offer it, and made sure to get the word out and a few people said they'll consider it, but others waved her off. Not many wanted to confront the issues, they wanted to believe things were okay... but they're far from "okay". 

She waited patiently in her office for someone to turn up, but she had no appointments. That's okay, she'll give them time and soon enough, someone has to show up and ask for help, and she can lend them a hand. With her back turned to the door, slipping a book into the shelf behind her desk, her thoughts wandered to the people she had came across and informed about her new profession. She thought about their reactions, how they each pretended to be alright and brush her off. Were they too proud? Maybe that's the case for a few, but surely not all. 

Perhaps, they don't even realize it.

The creak of a door snapped him out of his thoughts, and he flinched. It turns out she had a patient after all, though no one made an appointment. She glanced over her shoulder and her eyes widened at who she saw by the door. 

"Um... hello? Sorry, am I supposed to book an appointment first?" There stood Ranboo, having to duck under the door to get in. He rubbed his arm and he took in his surroundings, the small but contempt office. Out of all people, she didn't expect him to be her first patient, but he had said he'd consider it when she told him about this. 

A gentle smile crossed her face, she turned around to face him and walking over, took a seat. "Normally, yes, but I can let it slide this time," he responded, propping her head up on her palms. "Take a seat, Ranboo, and tell me why you're here," she gestured to the couch in front of her. 

"Oh, right," Ranboo did as he was told, sitting down slightly hunched over with his hands on his knees. He visibly seemed on edge, though avoiding eye-contact is a usual thing for him, she still remembers what happened the last time she looked him in the eyes, it still gives her shivers. 

She gave him a few moments of silence to speak on his own, but with his gaze directed at the floor he didn't say a word. Her smile started to droop, "Ranboo, do you mind telling me what's wrong? I'm here to listen, after all, but take your time." 

He flinched, as if she startled him or snapped him out of a daze. "R-right... sorry, it's just... a lot, and you won't judge?" He said, leaning more forward he started curling into himself. Puffy could already pick the anxiety out of his voice, her smile gone from her face. 

She reached out her hand, resting it on the desk. "Hey," she said softly, and he lifted his head a little, "I won't judge. I promise, my job is to listen to anything you have to say so I can help you, and you're my friend," she reassured, and watched his body relax; his shoulders falling. 

His head still tilted downwards a little, a couple seconds of silence passed. He took in a deep breath, and shakily exhaled, his hands balling into fists. "Right... right," a little more time passed and Puffy waited for him to speak on his own. "It's just... a lot of things. I jot down everything important in my memory book, but sometimes I still forget things. I never forget people, or faces, but it's a... it could be a possibility, there could be a few things I don't remember, and I just haven't realized."

The cause of his memory is still unknown, it could be related to his part enderman side, or a past trauma. There's no way to tell for sure, and he's never outright talked about his memory that much before, at least not with her. She nodded, telling him to continue. 

"I'm... sort of glad L'manberg's gone now. I know that might paint me in a bad way, but people cared more about buildings and sides which are replaceable, rather than their friends and people. Things are kind of calmer after it got blown up, now the only thing we have to deal with is that... Eggpire thing going around."

She frowned at the mention of it. It's still spreading, and unless something is done about it that isn't going to change. She had to agree with him, without L'manberg, there are no more unnecessary conflicts, except for the egg which is growing more out of control by the day. "And you? What have you been doing since it got destroyed?" 

Ranboo raises his head, and looks to his right, where a painting hangs. "Well, I... live far away from here, in the arctic, on my own. It's nice, being away from everything," he answered, his tone becoming a little happier. It briefly returned the smile to Puffy's face.

"Alone? Like, completely alone?"

"Well, I have my pets, and I still visit everyone. I'm not lonely, I have friends..." he assured, but as he trailed off, his smile began to falter. He shook his head, "yeah, I have friends. They, saw me as a traitor at one point, I can't remember if you were there... but they realized the truth. I have Tommy, Tubbo..." he fell silent. 

Just when Puffy opened her mouth to speak, Ranboo unintentionally cut her off, lowering his head again. "People have been telling me that I sleepwalk now, and that I speak in enderman language... I, don't know how to fix that and I don't suppose you do, either." 

Puffy averted her gaze, "no... I don't," she replied quietly, and Ranboo hummed. 

Ranboo paused before continuing, "I've, uh, I've been having nightmares..."

"About what?"

He visibly hesitated, tightening his fists his eyes looked like they'd burn a hole through the floor. "That's not... well, I..." he stumbled over his words, as if contemplating what to say.

Puffy leaned forward, extending out both her hands. "Ranboo, you can tell me. Whatever you tell me, I'll keep a secret, no matter what it is," she promised. Judging by his reaction, did he not trust her? They're friends, even if they have been a little distant recently. It's understandable this is likely his first time branching out, but it's terrible to keep emotions, especially fears bottled up and leaving them to explode when it becomes too much. "Ranboo, if you want me to help you, I need to know." 

Ranboo pulled his knees to his chest, shifting around uncomfortably. He shut his eyes, "I've been so helpful and friendly, so why do I feel so... alone," he whispered, curling himself into a ball. 

Puffy thought on it, then stood up and approached him. She stopped a short distance away, unsure if she should come closer. "Maybe because you don't let people in, Ranboo. Trust is a two-way street, if you want them to understand, you have to share what's troubling you."

Ranboo wrapped his arms tighter around himself, his sharp claws subconsciously digging into his sleeves. 

From his very first day, everything went wrong. Tommy got exiled, he tried to help him and he couldn't, he chose people over sides, he cared about his friends more than anything else and they went against that. He picked trust, but it wasn't reciprocated. All because of one book that incriminated him. He hadn't even done anything wrong, what did he do wrong? 

The voice, he got rid of it. He swore he did, he had control over his own thoughts again, he was finally free. Then the nightmare, "Dream"'s stern voice repeating what he said last time, he blew up the community house, it's _his_ fault and now he suffers the consequences. It'd only been a nightmare, but at some point he visited the prison, he talked to Dream in the other state. 

The books, that damned smiley face, and Sam's concerned voice breaking through; "are you okay?" 

He isn't okay. Not anymore.

"Ranboo!" Puffy raised her voice, audibly worried and freaking out somewhat. She stood before him, waiting for a response as her heart pounded in her chest. He'd just shut down completely, she needed to snap him out of it somehow before it escalated. He'd started making enderman noises, but thankfully, simply saying his name seemed to have worked. 

Tears had started streaming down his face and he hadn't even noticed, but as soon as he broke out of his thoughts, the burning sensation came in. His body relaxed and he slowly unwrapped himself, lowering his legs the tears continued to fall, he didn't even try to wipe them away. "I've been so good, I've been working so hard..." he choked out, staring at the ground. He buried his face in his hands. "I, I can't... I can't tell you, it's too much, you can't help. I don't know why I, I came here in the first place..." he stumbled to his feet, the pain grounding him. 

Puffy stepped closer, cautiously reaching her hand out. Ranboo sniffled, and she froze. 

"I'm supposed to feel better, why don't I feel better?" 

Her heart sank to the bottom of her chest, and she wrapped her arms around Ranboo, despite the major height difference between them. He's only a child with a long life ahead of him, and he's already been through so much in the past couple of months, she can't even begin to understand. "I'm not going to force you to speak, but it's the only way I can help you, and I want to help you, Ranboo. You deserve to be happy."

Ranboo's tears stopped, the burning sensation was agony, but he didn't even flinch. _"You deserve to be happy."_

The happy faces of his friends, and everyone he knows flashed through his mind. He took a step back, and hugged his arms around himself. "I'm... not so sure about that." 


	2. I've been so good, why am I feeling empty?

Yesterday, Ranboo had an appointment with Puffy, and she did the best she could, but Ranboo hid too much of himself away. He wouldn't let her in to help him, he clearly wanted to as that's why he came in the first place, but something stopped him from doing so. He claimed that she couldn't help him, and despite her saying that she could, he still insisted that she couldn't, even saying that it didn't matter. Nevertheless, he ended up letting his emotions out, losing control of them even and burned himself with his own tears as a result. He's only a kid, he doesn't deserve this. 

"I'm not so sure about that." 

Yet, for one reason or another, he thinks he does. In the end, she couldn't force him to speak, but it didn't seem like he'd explain everything on his own. Even if that's the case, she couldn't push him, if he wants to tell her, then he can. If he doesn't... 

It sounded like he's afraid to let her know the truth, even after she reassured him no one else would find out. Any secrets he had would be safe with her, and she only wanted to help. She managed to get a few things out of him, and it's clear that after everything that happens, he has some sense of being alone, even though that's not the truth at all. He appeared conflicted with that, admitting out loud that he did have friends, but at the same time seemed to doubt that statement. 

She unfortunately couldn't help with his memory loss, and she isn't sure if anyone can. Of course, that doesn't mean there's no solution, she just hasn't come across one yet. She told him to seek help from other people, or else this feeling of being alone would only stay, and develop, becoming harder and harder to remove. If he doesn't let people in, then he really will end up alone. No one wants that. 

It happened yesterday, but her mind has been on their conversation ever since. He needs help, and that's what she's here to provide. However, she hates how she couldn't do much, when he had the confidence to ask for help, there was little advice she could give him. It's been driving her crazy, before he left, she advised him to come back whenever he's ready. He seemed hesitant, but said that he'll keep the suggestion in mind, and thanked her. Then, he left without another word.

She's admittedly hoping he'll come back today, but considering how he reacted yesterday, it may be a little too soon. She needs some way to help him, with just anything, but she hasn't found out how yet. Another talk with him should help, if she can get him to explain everything without pushing him, because he's obviously hiding something. Otherwise, they can slowly build up to that with continuous visits, taking it a slow pace that may be better suited. That looks like the best option. 

Sitting at her desk, tapping her nails against the wooden table, she heard the door creak open and footsteps. Her head perked up, eyes widening, she raised from her seat. "Ranboo, you─" her words died in her throat. Instead of Ranboo, she found the second last person she thought to see approaching her. 

Tommy, appearing uncharacteristically unnerved, he jumped at her loud voice. She cleared her throat and sat back down, mentally scolding herself for her action. 

Tommy held onto the door with one hand, short nails digging into the wood. His eyes darted to the ground and he stepped back, a deep frown on his face. "Sorry, I'll just..."

Not a second going by, she jumped to her feet, accidentally slamming her hands against the desk, startling Tommy a second time. "No, wait! I'm not expecting anybody," she assured. Noticing how she frightened him, she scolded herself under her breath and lowered herself back into her chair. "I'm sorry, I just... If you're here for a session, come take a seat," she said in a much softer voice, gesturing to the couch.

Tommy glanced between her and the couch, slowly letting go of the door he appeared unsure, to say the least. "But didn't you just...?" He trailed off, looking back to her. He didn't finish that sentence, and reluctantly walked over and sat down. His movements were unusually stiff for someone so loud and always bouncing off the walls, he's acting like a different person. Everything from his nervous expression to how he sat, terribly hunched over with his hands on his knees. 

Puffy thought over her words before speaking, "so... Tommy, what brings you here? How are you feeling?" She asked.

He seemed almost taken back by her simple question. "Fine, oh no, everything's fine," he answered in a more familiar tone, but it sounded strained and even the slight smile tugging on the corner of his mouth looked forced. Not to mention, the barely noticeable eyebags which she almost missed. "I've been working on the hotel with Sam Nook, I wrote invitations to everyone..." 

The hotel, right, she remembers that. Along with Sam Nook, and with that in mind, she recalled the gruesome rescue mission she and Tommy did to save Sam from the egg's clutches. It'd been a high stress situation, and she stayed with Tommy for the most part, even after they safely escorted Sam to his home, she didn't leave until she made sure he was alright. 

"But Tommy, if you were feeling fine, then you wouldn't be here," she commented, glancing at his fidgeting hands, nails digging into his knees. 

With those simple words, the disguise he wore fell. His smile drooped, and his eyes looked concerningly hollow compared to the last time she'd seen him, which hadn't been too long ago. Just, what, a few days? Two or one. He lowered his head, his hair fell into his face and his hands balled into fists. "Tommy...?"

He enhaled a sharp breath, and abruptly stood up. His hands flew up to his head, entangled in his messy hair. "I-I've been so good, why am I feeling empty?" He cried, sounding more frustrated than anything. He wore a look of desperation, grabbing fistfuls of his hair, then shook his head and started pacing back and forth. "I don't, I don't understand. I'm free now, Dream's literally locked away in prison, he can't do anything to me anymore!" He raised his voice, practically shouting. 

"Tommy," Puffy tried to speak, slowly standing up, but she stopped herself when he froze. 

"He's in _prison,_ far away from here. I'm not in exile anymore, I have the discs so why do I..." he trailed off, his voice breaking towards the end. From where she stood, Puffy could see tears in the corners of his eyes. She quietly moved around her desk, coming towards him. "What the hell!"

She stopped a couple steps away. "Tommy, from what I know, Dream treated you horribly. You're right, he can't hurt you anymore, you need to remember and believe that. You're safe now, you might have lost L'manberg but you still have your friends, and you have the discs, you won against Dream. Everyone did," she assured him, talking softly.

The way he stared at nothing in particular, he looked... lost, or in a daze. Dream won't hurt him anymore, but she thought back to the meeting she had with Bad just before he trapped sam in the egg. He wants Tommy dead, not caring if he's only a child who's already been through so much, far too much than anyone his age should have to deal with. He made mistakes, admittedly, everyone does, but he's making up for them and even if he did cause a bit of trouble, he doesn't deserve death of all things. What he does deserve is a second chance. 

"He's gone, so why the hell do I... I'm fine, I don't need help. I... fuck, shit, I don't..." his hands started shaking, he covered his ears and closed his eyes.

"Calm down, Tommy, and talk me through it, so I can help you," she told him, gently setting a hand on his shoulder, and it worked. He reluctantly blinked his eyes open, and seeing her, his body relaxed. He backed away into the couch, and plopped down onto it in a fetal position, knees to his chest. He wants help, that's the first step to fixing things. "Now, is there anything else that's bothering you?"

He glanced around the room, pondering on it. After a few moments of silence, he spoke up in a lower, quieter voice, staring at the floor. "I still hear Wilbur's voice. I have been for a while now, and I'm glad he's coming back, but I... don't know how to feel about him, you know? I preferred Ghostbur, but he wanted to be resurrected, so..." he trailed off, and Puffy nodded along, sitting on her desk.

She hadn't met Wilbur in person, but she heard about his deeds, how he used to be a friendly, great man who loved music, his country and friends. From other people, they mention how he lost his mind and gave up everything for L'manberg, saying if he couldn't have it, no one can, despite how much he gave up for it in the end. He threw it all away. "I... see, and... why don't you like the old Wilbur that much?" She continued carefully, wanting to imply if he didn't want to talk, she won't force him to. 

He paused before answering, exhaling a long, deep breath. "He, I mean he... I looked up to him like my older brother, he's the first person who looked out for me, I trusted him. I cared for him, and I believed in him when he... I only had him when we were exiled, but then he started acting strange and I... and he..." 

Listening closely to his words, she paid attention to how he tapped his foot on the floor, his arms were still wrapped around himself loosely, and his eyes were glued to the floor. "He isn't... as good as I remember him as, but he's my brother, you know? He acted like one, at least..." he mumbled. A few seconds of silence passed, and he stood up again, groaning as he buried his face in his hands. "I don't, I'm not good at this," he admitted, voice muffled. 

"It's okay, Tommy, you're doing okay. Just breathe, and count down from ten," Puffy guided, and he nodded. Keeping his hands over his face, he breathed in through the nose, and out the mouth while counting down in his head. Once hitting zero, he removed his hands. 

"I do miss him," he whispered. "I... probably shouldn't, but I do. I miss a lot of people who I shouldn't, I don't know why, I keep running back to them..." she could hear him grinding his teeth, and watched him run his dull nails over his up and down his arm. He let out a strained chuckle, a small, nervous smile coming up. "It's stupid, I know."

Puffy shook her head, taking a step towards him. "You miss people because you care about them, it might be a little unnecessary, but it's not stupid. You can't help it, but you can learn to forget those people, if the only thing they're doing is dragging you down," she advised. She flashed a gentle smile, meeting his gaze. "You haven't been getting much sleep lately, have you?"

His frown deepened and lowering his head, he sighed and sat back down. "No... yes, no," he entangled his fingers in his hair, getting them stuck in his locks. "What, am I normal or not? Am I crazy?" He asked, voice fading into a whisper. 

Puffy crouched down before him, "no, Tommy, you're far from crazy. You're just a kid who's been through a lot, you're not crazy. You went through a whole war, you were exiled, and you deserved none of it."

The war. Tommy delved into his thoughts, recalling standing across from Wilbur back so long ago, but it's only been months. _"Are we the bad guys?"_

Tubbo exiled him, his own friend, someone he could even consider a brother. He sent him away, and it all went downhil from there. He shut his eyes, remembering waking up some days underwater, coming so close to drowning. He remembers Dream visiting him every day, and blowing up his items, but sometimes letting him keep them, until he blew up everything and left him absolutely nothing. He isn't a friend, he admitted to never being on his side and only used him for power; he's his puppet on a string. 

He's cut those strings loose, though, he's free now, is he not?

He's locked away. He has the hotel and Sam Nook, he has Tubbo again. He went to Logstedshire, it doesn't bother him anymore and the lava feels indifferent to him. Things have changed for the better. 

_You deserved none of it._

If things really have changed, then why don't they feel any better? Why doesn't _he_ feel better?

It's too late. They exiled him, and now they're out of his reach. They only view him as an annoying little kid, and that's all he is. Just someone bothersome, who doesn't matter. If he doesn't matter, then why is he still here? What's his purpose, after everything? He stayed alive when he should have died countless times, he's only down to one life.

His arms wrapped around himself, he paced back and forth, his breathing speeding up. "I've been so good, where the hell is the karma?" He cried, "they hate me, they all hate me. I deserve it, all of it, don't I? Fuck, crap, they hate me. I-I'm trying to make things right, I talked with Techno, I, that doesn't matter though, right? They still hate me."

Wilbur, Phil, Techno, Tubbo, everyone... why does he feel so alone?

"Tommy, you're not alone." 

Tommy raised his head and realized he'd started crying. He quickly wiped them away, "I'm sorry, I don't know what happened, I just," he went on, unable to finish his sentence. "Why... am I crying?" He whispered to himself, staring at his hands as tears fell from his eyes, and rolled down his face, droplets falling onto his hands. 

Puffy placed a hand on his shoulder, and they locked eyes. "It's because you're scared, Tommy, and that's okay. I'm here to help you, that's what you came here for. It's a slow process, but I promise to help you recover, from everything."

Tommy felt lightheaded, and almost missed Puffy speaking. "You... promise?"

She smiled, and nodded, pulling him into a hug that paralyzed him. "I promise."


	3. I've been so good, I've been so good this year

In two days, Puffy has had two patients, both children. She still hasn't heard back from Ranboo, and as for Tommy, she taught him methods of calming down. He seemed hesitant to return, not giving a definite answer on it, but she told him it would be for the best, then she could help him more. He appeared to take that into consideration, and left. She somewhat hoped he would come back today, but oh well. 

She sat at her desk, playing with a pen. Tommy has been through a lot and he's just sixteen, being a child soldier is one thing, but having to be exiled twice and the second time, left to defend himself on his own? It'd be more concerning if he acted like nothing happened. The human mind can only take so much, it bends under pressure and without relief, things only get worse. She opened this place hoping to provide that relief. 

The door opened, and she glanced in the direction, leaning back in her office chair. She didn't see Ranboo, nor Tommy, but a new, unexpected face as her third patient. "Tubbo?" She blinked in surprise, her eyes following the young boy who cracked a smile and entered the room, closing the door behind him. 

He silently walked over to the couch, and sat down. "Um, hello Miss Puffy, or... is just Puffy okay? Sorry, I just came here on a whim so I'm sorry if I'm supposed to make an appointment first. Is it okay if I'm here? Or would you rather I wait outside?" He greeted, in the process of standing back up.

Puffy quickly stopped him, "it's alright! Originally, people were supposed to book appointments, but you're not the first one, so it's fine," she assured, gesturing for him to sit back down, and he did. "Now, since you're here, what's bothering you, Tubbo? You can tell me anything, I won't judge, and I'll keep it to myself."

Tubbo's smile began to disappear, shifting in his seat he glanced around the room. He gulped, and scratched the back of his neck, "well..." he trailed off, staring at the floor. 

"Take your time," Puffy said with a smile, briefly meeting his eyes.

Tubbo softly sighed, his hand falling to his side. "I'm not even sure if I should be here, I mean, my problems aren't _that_ bad. Surely you have other, more important people to attend to, so maybe I should just go," he blabbered, abruptly getting up, Puffy interrupted him before he could make another move.

"Tubbo," her slightly more serious tone froze him in place, "do not compare your problems to someone else's. They are not lesser than somebody else's, and you're wrong, I actually don't have anyone else unless another person wants to waltz in, so please, take a seat." 

Tubbo opened his mouth to argue, but nothing came out, and he sat back down. His expression turning sad, his leg started bouncing as he fumbled with his hands and cracked his knuckles. 

Puffy relaxed in her chair, and leaned forward. "Now, Tubbo, what's the matter?"

"I-it's nothing _that_ bad," he blurted out, ram-like ears twitching. "It's just..." 

"Tubbo."

Tubbo sighed, running his hands through his hair. "I just, it's Tommy," he started, cupping his face, "he's so distant lately. I understand why, I tried reconnecting, asking him to move into Snowchester, but he'd rather avoid countries and all that stuff, w-which is understandable. I miss him, a lot, and he seems to be doing okay, but... I, I'm afraid he's going to leave me behind." The last part came out as a whisper, his hands covering his face as he hunched over.

Puffy's expression saddened, setting down her pen. "Tubbo..." they've been through a lot, practically always together, they were the closest of friends. "Do you know... why he's acting that way? Sometimes it's for the best if you and your friends have some time apart." She thought back to her conversation with Tommy, how he panicked and cried, and cried, and pushed that memory to the back of her head.

She regretted her words noticing Tubbo fall silent, but she lost the chance to rephrase herself. 

"It's because I exiled him, I left him alone with Dream! He still won't talk about it, I know something happened. It's so painfully obvious, especially when we confronted Dream before everyone arrived, Dream admitted to treating Tommy horribly, but I still don't know the whole story!" He ranted, hands tightly grabbing onto his horns. "I know he's forgiven me, but I haven't! He isn't telling me, because he knows it's my fault! If I hadn't sent him away, then, none of that would've happened!" 

Their friendship has gone through many obstacles, but they stuck together through thick and thin, always having each other's backs. "Tubbo," she spoke softly, "you just said Tommy's forgiven you. He doesn't blame you, and so, you shouldn't have to be mad at yourself. It's okay to forgive yourself, that was in the past─" she didn't get to finish.

"It's all because I became President! Dream was right, I brought L'manberg crumbling down, just like Schlatt did! I'm even starting to look like him!" He yelled, tightening his grip on his horns, he gritted his teeth. "I was a terrible President and a terrible friend, I pushed Tommy away and now, i-it's too late! "

"Tubbo, it's not too late," she told him sternly, rising up from her chair. For a moment her expression turned serious, but her heart ached as Tubbo began breaking down.

"I've been so good, I've been so good this year! It's a new beginning, L'manberg's gone, and I drove it to it's doom! If anyone else had been President, then maybe, it'd still be standing!" Tubbo's voice cracked as he raised his voice, and tears filled the corners of his eyes. 

"That's not true, Dream only wanted to get under your skin. You can't change the past, but you can decide your future," she informed him in a soothing tone. She wanted to come closer and comfort him, but he came to her, slamming his hands down on the desk it made her jump back. 

Tears were running down Tubbo's face. "Right, I've tried doing everything right! So where's the karma, I-I'm losing my patience, I'm losing my _friends,_ " he shouted and sobbed. Puffy outstretched her hand to comfort him, but he backed away, wiping the tears from his face with his sleeve. "Do I deserve this? Everything, I'm down to my last life, did I deserve to lose them?"

The final control room and betrayal by a close friend, and another betrayal by someone he trusted at the festival, and in the end forgave. The events came full circle, he's just as bad as them, isn't he? After all, he betrayed Tommy when he put his trust in him. He promised not to become like Schlatt, but he's turning into him, isn't he?

Feeling arms securely wrapped around him, reminded him of being trapped inside a box, struggling to get out before time ran out. He let out an animal-like cry and pushed Puffy away without thinking. His mind flashed back to when he visited Tommy after failing to execute Techno, and he came across a large, cobblestone pillar. For so long, he thought Tommy had... lost his final life, he even planned a whole funeral for him, he beat himself over it every night, blaming himself. Only to find Tommy still alive, joining the enemy's side because he had nowhere else to go. No one else to protect him. He'd been left with no other choice, his "family" already turned their backs on him, why shouldn't he do the same?

Oh, what a messed up journey they've been through, but in the end, they're still here. Aren't they? They survived against all odds, even if they are down to one life. There's no more Dream, he's locked away because they defeated him, and he had to beg for mercy on his last life. 

"You're okay, Tubbo, breathe," Puffy instructed, gripping him by the shoulders he snapped out of his thoughts and back into reality. His tears stopped, and he stared at Puffy. "You're okay. You don't deserve anything that's happened to you, you were put into a position of power you weren't ready for, it's not your fault L'manberg crumbled. Whether you were President or someone else, things wouldn't have changed."

Lowering his head, his body began to tremble. He leaned forward into Puffy's embrace, and in his mind, recalled Tommy telling him to count down from ten, and whispered it. "Ten, nine... eight, seven..." 

Resting a hand on his head, Puffy brushed his hair. "It's okay, Tubbo... it's going to be okay."

She says that so confidently as Tubbo relaxes in her hold, but in the back of her mind she can't help but think back to the egg. How it's taking over, how her former friends literally want her gone just because the egg says so, and they almost lost Sam, too. It may not have an affect on any of the kids by what she's seen, but that only puts them more at risk.

She needs to keep them safe, her duty as a knight even though she's given up that title. They need her protection and so, she'll make sure they won't have to suffer anymore than they already have. That's a promise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> forgot to self-promote; add me on twitter, username sunny-ghost
> 
> I need friends


End file.
